Attention Beneficiary…

Author Flying Pharmacist
Author Flying Pharmacist

From: “MR. JOHN SMITH” <isaac@server1.premiumcredit.com.au>

MR. JOHN SMITH
EMAIL: ( mrjohn_smith1@live.com )

Attention Beneficiary,

Howdy!

I have been waiting for you since then to come down here and Pick your outstanding payment left but I did not hear from you since that time as we fixed

Really? Have we met?

Then I went and deposited the $10,500,000.00 US Dollars. I lodged the funds inside a Copper box as Consignment with DHL COURIER in Nigeria because I traveled to China to visit my friend for the Company’s Annual Board meeting. I will not be back still Next year February.

A copper box..?

Why copper? Why not iron or cement? How about a heavily guarded bank-vault? You might not realise it what with your international travelling lifestyle, but copper is a much sought-after resource these days; why do you think peeps risk their lives nicking it from railways?

Please note that I did not disclose to the Courier that the Content of the Consignment box is cash money, instead.

I should bloody well hope not seeing as you’ve presumably pinched it from a bank in boomfuckistan and are kindly going to share it with me, a complete stranger. God knows you can’t trust anyone these days.

I registered the consignment as containing some pieces of art work; this was for security reason and to ensure that the Consigned fund reached you safely.

That’s not going to help; art gets lifted all the time. Look at the FBI website if you don’t believe me.

I want you to contact the DHL COURIER to know when they will deliver your package (fund).

I can only presume that as you don’t want this money for yourself that you’ve become a monk. My regards to the abbott.

I have paid for the delivering charges except the Security Keeping Fee which they said it can only be paid when the Deposits are ready for shipment to the Receiver.

This seems totally legitimate.

Therefore, the only money you have to send to them is their Security Keeping Fee to receive your package at your Nominated address.

I think as you’ve become a monk, that the buddhist religion could do with this cash, especially seeing as they’re homeless at the moment because of a border dispute with China.

So be advised to contact the Courier Director through this below details and ask him where you will send the Security Keeping Fee for the immediate delivery and reconfirm to them the information and address where to send the Package to you.

Is the Dalai Lama a Mr or Rev.?

Contact: Mr. Kelvin Harris
Manager 🙁 DHL Courier Company Ltd)
Contact E-mail: ( dhlcustomercarenig1@live.com )
Contact Number: +2348085775418

Now that’s odd. I’d have thought that DHL being one of the biggest courier companies in the world would have their own email address. For you that would be something like scammer@dhl.com or conjob@dhl.com?

Interestingly, the phone number when entered into Google gives me a link talking about a fake lottery scam. But you’re a monk, Mr. John Smith, aren’t you supposed to tell the truth or something? Aren’t there vows that go along with poverty and getting up at stupid-o-clock in the morning to do lotus position and sweep the stairs?

Reconfirm below information to the company
Your Full Name:
Your Home Address:
Your home phone(s):
Your cell phone:
You’re Country:

Let me know as soon as you received the consignment (fund) so that I will be sure you received the total $10,500,000.00

Will do. Which monastery can I get you at?

Best Wishes,

MR. JOHN SMITH

Hats off to you for your vow of poverty John. Takes a very strong and devout person to do something like that.

Author: gotheek

Sometime writer, full time human.