I am so good, I get tongue-tied talking to myself.

Note for future reference: When having trouble setting-up printers on a PC, use Apple software to fix it!

Bonjour in-fact…

And to install a printer which is connected to an Apple airport network, check this out!

Cop THAT Ballmer, you skanky git!

DRM is dead. Long may it remain that way…

However, not to be outdone, Sony music (among others) are now resurrecting the long-thought-dead concept of watermarking.

And MS, that champion of the rights of the consumer at its own cost*, has patented El Dorado, which will supposedly remain with music for the length of its lifespan (in the case of most pop music, about thirty seconds after it hits music shops; what’s the point?!)

The death of the music and TV industries can’t come fast enough IMO. Even the movie makers are jumping on the internet bandwagon. 

As a good friend has put it: the patriarchy is dying, best get out of the way.

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* Joke, Joyce.

Thanks to M:bot for this hideous monstrosity.

Disappointing.

That’s what I call the Kensington Expert Mouse trackball.

It’s my own fault, of course. I bought it sight-unseen. That is, I’d seen the site and thought that it couldn’t possibly be that big.

Well, big it is. Huge in fact. I was hoping to be able to use it portably, for the laptop among other things. Not This Little Black Duck.

4-5 inches long by 4 inches wide, is freaking enormous by mouse standards, not to mention trackball standards.

I was finding the Logitech trackball a bit big, but the Kensington one makes my current trackball look positively tiny. Side-by-side, the Logitech one is half the size and half the weight. It’s also got a smoother ride on the ball, and while the Kensington one has a natty scroll wheel (around the ball), it’s not that big a deal.

I think I’m going to stick the kensington one on eBay as soon as I get home.

Note to self: don’t buy sight unseen. Unless it’s Apple stuff

It suddenly occurs to me that Microsoft products suffer from systematic “Trying-to-be-too-many-things-to-too-many-people”. What this means is that their products, while they can do all sorts of amazing things, are either too complicated for the average Jo to understand but at the same time, set-up with the Lowest-Common-Denominator in mind, thus annoying the hell out of the more advanced user. MS Word Paperclip anyone? How about that sodding dog for searching?

In short, the designers don’t know their own audience, and so the software isn’t any good for anyone specifically. The features are vast, but you can’t get at most of them without a brick-thick book next to you, titled something along the lines of Windows functionality for people who don’t necessarily know everything about it but need to do a single simple thing. Setting up your email? A home network? Turn off those damn bubble messages that popup whenever windows has found something and wants to tell you about, like some 4 year old?*

Apple on the other hand, has designed their software with simple useability in mind. Yes, the systems restrict you to doing things in a particular way, but once you know that way, you’re fine.

Take the iPod. Yes, that old chestnut. Install iTunes, plug the iPod in and you’re off. Anycomputer (Mac or Windows [not sure about Linux to be honest]), any time.

Now take the Creative Zen that I was trying to get to work 2 years ago, brand-new, out of the box. I do hope they’ve improved their software and hardware because frankly, a system requirement that I had to search high-and-low for on the net because it wasn’t on the box is fundamentally bent-in-the-head. Turned out, the hardware required an obscure XP service pack to be installed, a version of Windows Media Player 10 and dose of good luck (and I’m not joking about that last bit) before it would even think about working with Windows and copying music. And if you had a mac, well, forget it, because it wouldn’t work.

That is why Apple carved-up the personal player market. The Zen has more features, an FM radio, good internal functionality, but if you can’t load music onto it, then it’s an expensive doorstop.

Similarly, the PC versus Mac thing. All right, PC has got the lions-share of the home and business computer market, but given the sick, sick joke that is Vista, computer manufacturers offering windows XP as an operating system and Microsoft’s forcible retirement of XP (presumably because they just can’t admit what a brick Vista actually is and there’s far too much money at stake share-wise if they do, not to mention the scalps of many on the payroll) and you’ve got what could very well be The End Of The Line.

——————-

*Ah, you might say, what about the Interweb? To which I reply, what about it? I’ve got a PC at home which can’t see the bleeding network which is connected to said web, and you’re telling me to refer to the internet to tell me how to connect to the internet?

Slightly old, but still relevant; Free WiFI spots around the country.

I’ll only add to this that there’s one right in front of The Guru and The Teacher’s place in Reservoir, where on Christmas eve last year, I was able to make a Skype call because my phone was out of credit. Nice one!

The Guru has told me that Apple will be making iPod Touch APIs available in 2008 for developers to get into the code. And what that means is that those already working on a VoIP solution will be able to refine things so ultimately, the iPhone won’t actually be needed.

As long as you can find a WiFi point of course! But how far – honestly – is it away from being open slather? With Meraki and Community Wireless at work, we’ll finally be able to stop being gouged by Hellstra and Opt-arse for WiFi.

The grand experiment is over.

Okay, so FlyaKite isn’t as good as it looks. It’s got issues with drag-and-drop to the dock and running Skype and Outlook.

So I’m uninstalling and going back to the <whispers> windows UI </whispers>.

I’ll wait another version and see what it’s like then. Dammit!

Tech tips!

• Hate your Windows desktop?
• Running Xtra Problems, Windows 2Krap or any of the other laudable attempts from Microsoft to create an operating system that actually enables you – the user – to actually get something done?
• Wonder about the opposition, and what those mac-heads are really banging-on about when they drool over their shiny new macs and the operating systems thereof?

Wonder no more!

Simply download FlyAKite!

Download the Zip file to your Piece of Crap, extract the FlyakiteOSX executable and run it.

After a quick restart you’ll end-up with this:

…and feel a LOT better than you did.

All they’ve got to do is get the UI buttons on the correct side (MS has the window controls on the right, MAC has them on the left) and fix the Firefox icon (which when you add it to the dock, appears as the OSX finder icon) and they’ll be fine and funky!

w00t!

The sun is shining, and it’s a pleasant clement (as opposed to inclement) day for a change.

Pity I’m up here at work.

However, I need the cash to fund my outrageous lifestyle.

Onto other things however, I will inform you of the reasoning for the title of this blog: Lisa 4.0.

• Lisa 1.0 was pre-goth, vaguely boring, still very edgy and somewhat bland.
• Lisa 2.0 was goth Lisa, who was very black but using the fabulous clothing to tell the world to Look but not touch. She liked being allowed to be different, wintertime, the active use of the piss-take (esp being a goth in Camberwell) and Apple Computers; and didn’t like one little bit, blandites, suburbia, loudmouths, naysayers, boredom and bureaucracy.
• Lisa 3.0 was post-goth, still oddly attired (and a winter person in general, mainly because she could dress-up and stuff and that the clothing she owned was far too heavy [wintery anyone] for summertime conditions). She liked being able to dress oddly, wintertime, apple computers; hated summer, the new doctor who, four-wheel drivers, Freaking PCs (both the hardware and the individuals), Microsoft Windows and all that sailed in her.
• Lisa 4.0 is post vipassana meditation, and is very chilled, relaxed and has her circles securely aligned. She likes the new doctor who, bike riding and silent meditation. Nothing bothers her except for bad drivers (whom she forgives as they are obviously SPMs*), and four-wheel-drives and their drivers (and since she has friends with these, she’s had to tone-down her four-letter diatribes about them and their owners). C’est la vie.

So there you are. The explanation, the generalities and the transformation.

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* SPMs = Small Penis Men