What kids are playing with today…

A PopBitch mail revealed this corker. Mummy, when I grow up, I want to harass ordinary people with a squat rod.

But further delving revealed to me the wonder of the children’s toy industry, at least the PlayMobil version:

Safe cracker set

The description of the “authentic” robbers cracks me up:

“…Set includes two robbers in signature undercover gear (plaid berets, sunglasses, and a leather jacket)…”

And you get a discount if you purchase:

Police Station with Jail Cell

I love this comment on the latter:

“…It is selected several times every day by children to play with. I was happy with the many features it has such as the jail cell, rotating camera, front desk, and there are several items for the police officers such as guns, stop sign, handcuffs, flashlights… “

A message I just sent around work:

Greetings fellow level-2′ers,

I am writing today to decry the sad and sorry state of the kitchen with regard to the following ongoing issues:

• dirty dishes
• dirty dishes being left to pile up in both sinks (especially the one with the hot and cold running water)
• dirty cutlery
• dirty benches

You’ll note — perhaps with interest — that the operative word here is “dirty“.

Now, as far as I’m aware, the only people who get to leave dishes unwashed in kitchens are:

1. Royalty
2. Children
3. Those lacking appropriate motor-skills to manipulate dishes and washcloths.

Furthermore, there are several prominently positioned “kitchen etiquette” posters which actually ask nicely that people clean the hell up after themselves.

Howsabout it people? None of you are royalty (otherwise you wouldn’t be working), there aren’t any children on this level at this point, and you’ve all got the motor skills to operate computers and telephones, so you should all be able to clean up your dirty dishes.

Frankly, after 10 years working in IT and related environments with levels of cleanliness of varying degrees, I feel it’s a bit much to expect someone else to clean up after yourself. What’s next, the toilet?

Yours in extreme boredom,

your friendly neighbourhood writer.

Wonder if it’ll work?